Friday, June 28, 2013

Healthy, not thin

Since today is the day my surgery was originally scheduled for, I thought it appropriate to blog.  First off, God blessed me by having the surgeon's office need to reschedule.  Last week I was hit with a horrible cold.  This week we have been battling a sometimes working air conditioner.  Yesterday it hit 105 here.  Everything is working now, but I can't imagine how stressed both my husband and I would be if I also was having surgery.

People keep telling me that I don't look heavy enough to have this surgery.  I think it is partially because I am fit, but partially that we all compare ourselves to others.  The surgeon told me that we don't know what normal looks like anymore.  Teaching water aerobics means that I have a lot of muscle mass.  Unfortunately, I also have a lot of fat on top of it. 

The other question I get is how much weight do I want to lose or what is my goal weight.  Honestly, I am not sure.  It seems so far away to me right now to choose a number.  Really, what I want is to get my body fat percentage down.  A number on the scale doesn't take into account if those pounds are fat or muscle.

It's interesting to note that a lot of the focus is on how I look now and how I will look later.  My goals are more based on health.  My main reason for choosing surgery is get rid of diabetes and sleep apnea.  The physical things I pray for are health and vitality.  I want to have more energy.  I want to not be afraid of physical activities.  I want to be able to go up the stairs at a waterpark 10 times in a row and not have my blood sugar plummet (or have my knees creek, or have my thighs scream, or be huffing for breath).  I feel like, my body will settle wherever is best for me.  Looking good will be a bonus, but being thin is not my goal.  My goal is to get this body strong and healthy. 

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